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To those who say why not, when our Loved Ones Journey to Heaven


Every day we are making memories and everyday we are coming to one realization or another. We are no different from one another, so why do so many try to say we are? I am who I am, I have lived, loved, bled, cried, shouted, yelled at God, and stomped my foot and so too…have you. I have lived thru pain and horrors in my life, just as you have lived thru one emotional suffrage after another. I have made mistakes and had triumphant moments of celebration. I have loved my loved ones and I have lost my loved ones and so too…have you. And we are still here to tell their story, still here to tell our story, still here making memories and keeping those memories alive with every breath we breathe and every smile we give to those around us, some days will go by and all we want to do is sit down and cry.

I remember the day when my Mother transitioned into Heaven…I remember it in such detail as to never forget the memories and the pain that goes with it. Some will say you are very lucky to have been with her in her transitioning as I was not. And to you I send my love, as I know that we are all not to be with our loved ones when they make that journey, it is all up to the General and our soul contracts. The clarity of all of it was for me and me alone to have such a burden during that time, as individuals don’t always understand death the way I do. Those moments are not always the easiest to go thru as your heart is breaking and at the same time there is so much to do physically and spiritual that there is no time to waste when they are ready. I am just fortunate when I look back thru my years in how my Mom and Grandmom would always have me to one side of that process, we may not understand it at the moment but, we know why, when the time comes.

That’s why I understand after everything happens and the process of mourning/grieving hits us like a ton of bricks that there are no answers as there are millions of answers. You see, we cannot see it for what it is as we walk thru it all. Long days of aftershock, organizing every detail, phone calls, making sure everyone else is okay as you go thru the motions. Nodding your head, trying to listen to what is being said as your mind is elsewhere and an endless line of hugs and sympathy. All until the last individuals leaves and you are alone within the quiet of your own mind…

I remember the days after my Mom transitioned, when everyone in my profession wanted to give me a message that she was ok. To let me know how much she loved me, how much she was proud of me. They went out of their way to find me and to tell me all of this as if they were giving me the greatest gift in the world. Huge smiles upon their faces as they looked to me with their last message upon their lips. I sat there and was graciously receiving their words, but I knew I did not ask for them. I did not seek them out to give to me what they believed I wanted. The just did not get it.

So to all my friends, family and clients who have lost a loved one…No, I will not tell you that your loved one is ok the very next day or then after. I will not tell you they are alright; I will not give you that message.

Understand it is not that I do not love you, or think you need it. It is not like they are not right there beside you at that moment in time loving you as much as you love them…Its just, being on the other side of this, learning and experiencing everything I have from a young age,  I am meticulous knowing about the Rules of Spirit. I have a love, an utmost respect and deep consciousness of integrity when it comes to our loved ones, you, me, Spirit, that I won’t cross that line, no matter what.

So to those who say why not….this is my message for when your loved one has transitioned to heaven and you are seeking a message that very day as you look at me…

I will not deliver that message to you for the very reason that…that you did not ask for that message; you did not seek me out to ask if they are ok.

 Do you get it?..

It is not for me and anyone else in this profession to walk right up to you and tell you that you are loved and that your loved ones are with you, that your loved ones have made it to heaven and are doing just fine…

I simple do not have your permission to do so…Do you get it?

I have too much integrity in my profession to step over the bounds and decide that you need that message…to just walk up to you to deliver that message… I know I did not ask for those messages that day after my Mom made her journey and how it felt when this was done to me. It was an invasion of my personal space that I wanted to share with only myself for a little while…feeling the emotions that were only mine…feeling the love and loss those first few days as I allowed myself to go thru the shock, the pain and then allow myself to deal with what I need to look at, how I still needed to feel their essence from the last moment I was with them, to move thru my own memories of our life together and simply breathe that in and enjoy. Memories flooding thru my mind and all around me.

Moreover you are still dealing with all the necessary plans for the coming days as you will be swamped with one person or another offering the condolences and any support you need. Why stand there and tell them that you are ok and nod your head when they offer “ is there anything you need, just let me know” if you cannot tell them to be there for you in a few weeks, in a few months when no one is around and everything seems to be closing in on you. When you need someone just to be there to let you know that you are still alive…to be there with a pot of soup to make sure you remember to eat…to send you a little card or gift to know they are really there for you. The process is not one that any of us walk until we are there within it.

But, what I will do for you is to be there with a shoulder for you to cry on, an open heart and ears to hear you as you need the time and space to speak your mind and sort out your own emotions…to be there as you process what you need for you to be ok…to assist in anyway I can as a friend… as you decide your next course of actions. And when you are ready to ask for that message then I am here, just as they are there…to deliver that message to you. When you ask, when you ask….I am ready, just as they are ready.

To be anything else is to not be responsible with who I am and what I do…and is not honoring those in Spirit…

Many times I am asked if it is too soon for me to deliver a message the very next day or even at that moment in time as they are transitioning and I will always say no…it is not too soon for me or them.

But maybe… just maybe… it is too soon for you to hear that message, but thank you for asking me. Thank you for asking which then allows me to give to you that message when you need it from your loved one. To schedule an appointment so that we have that loving space and time to allow you to receive their love, their words, all of those memories and everything else that lies close to your heart for you to know they are with you, and everything is right as it should be. For me to do anything else, places me back where I did not want to be all those years ago, when they were given to me from everyone when my Mom transitioned.

I will not tell you to come back and see me as you will know when the time is right…

I will not email you and tell you I have another message from your loved one, as that is just not how it works.  Once again, as you walk out my door or away from me, you did not give me never ending permission to keep attached to you to pester you in giving a message to you, just to get you back thru my door. I will not tell you they are in a dark place to have you come back or to live in fear, as the only dark place is behind your closed eye lids of pain and worry. I will not tell you they are not there, for yes, they are and they are everywhere.

What I will tell you is this… that you are loved from above and you are journeying your own path and that you have choices in life, just as they did. Live every moment with love in your heart and the authority that you were born with. Do not allow another to instill fear or anger, worry or panic within you, as that just allows them to live within your mind and they do not belong there. Clean out the garbage and replace it with love.

We are all the same; we just need someone to clear out the words left by so many that never had our best interest at heart. Your loved ones are waiting and they know as well as I … Permission is granted to those whom ask….

Love those around you whether you or they believe they deserve that love or not. Say I love you from your heart not because that is what is expected of you, but because that is who you are.

Have a Blessed Day of Peace and Love within you!


Love, Laughter & Light™,  Adele Marie

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